Changes
by Elliot Green
Summary: Hermione is sick and tired of being used. Harry and Ron always take advantage of her. So she decides to change. New look, new life. She even meets a new friend. Shoshanna likes pranks. So does she! NOTE: This is a parody!
1. A New Look

**Changes**

**A/N: Hermione is sick and tired of being used… Harry and Ron always take advantage of her. So she decides to change. New look, new life. But how will people react?**

**Marlicat: Hey! I'm not sure if you're reading this... But... I'm going to use this idea anyway, but no Voldemort's daughter-sharing bodies thing. You're right; that's not such a good idea. I will use your idea, but I'm having a bit of trouble writing it up. **

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Hermione stared at the girl in the mirror.

She had frizzy brown hair that fell past her shoulders, brown eyes and looked bookish.

She was wearing a pretty white T-shirt with flowers on it and light blue jeans and on top of that, white sneakers.

She let her friends walk all over her; never standing up. Sure, there were some things… Like S.P.E.W… And they acted like they cared. But they didn't. They didn't owl her for her birthday (A/N: Which for this story is August 5) at all. The only time they owled her was to ask for help on their homework. And she gave it to them. They didn't know her at all.

Then she turned away. This was her last year; there was no way she was going to continue to let them walk all over her.

An hour later she turned back to the mirror.

This girl was very different.

She had straight black hair that was pulled up into pigtails. Her eyes were still brown, but they were deeper. Accented by the dark purple eye shadow and lipstick, with the rest of her make-up black. She was wearing a dark purple tank top cut really low (**A/N: Low! Low! And I mean low!**), a short mini-skirt with fishnet stockings and black platform boots. (**A/N: I don't know how to explain them… But if you've ever watched Buffy the Vampire Slayer, then they're like Faith's. But they come a few inches above the ankle.**)

This was a girl who played pranks, didn't take any guff from anybody, and listened to Evanescence. (**A/N: Well, I listen to that too, but I'm not as dark… Blah.**)

This was a girl who was strong. Who could stand up to people better than the first girl. This was the girl she was going to be.

Even though she was Head Girl.

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_September 1. Kings Cross._

Hermione smiled to herself. Her parents were at a conference, so they didn't have to see the new her. That would be too weird.

She ran threw the barrier, and saw the gleaming red train. She bounced on her platform boots, and glanced up to see two guys chatting. She pulled her cart along behind her, and tapped one of the guys on the shoulder.

"Yes?" He said.

"Do you have a girl-friend?"

"No." He said, looking over her.

She pulled him into a really long kiss, with tongue.

"Will you go out with me?" The guy said, dazed.

"Nope." Hermione said smugly.

"Then why'd you kiss me?" He said, turning confused.

"Because I wanted to. And I hadn't had a kiss in a while."

"Ah… OK."

Hermione smiled, spun on her heel and stalked off.

"Who are you?" The guy called from behind her.

"Buh-bye."

Hermione grabbed her trunk and her cat carrier, and jumped onto the train.

She found an empty compartment and took her DS out of her shoulder-bag, put her trunk on the rack, and sat down with a flourish.

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Harry looked through the compartments when he finally found one with just one person in it.

"Mind if I sit here?" He said. The girl was wearing black and dark purple, wearing a lot of make-up, and playing a video game.

"Sure." She said uninterestedly.

"What are you playing?"

"Castlevania." (**A/N: This is an actual game.**) The girl replied, not looking up.

Harry walked in and sat down followed by Ron.

All of a sudden, something clicked.

"Hermione?!" Harry said in shock and the girl looked up.

"Yes? Oh, hi."

"Hermione? What is up with you? Have you been Imperiused?"

Hermione snorted. "Jeez. No, I haven't. Hey, did one of you guys get Head Boy?"

Harry shook his head. "Nah. Some Ravenclaw."

Hermione sighed. "We've got a new seventh year this year, already been sorted into Gryffindor. I better go welcome her." With that, she stood up, showing just how short her skirt really was.

Ron's jaw dropped. Harry knew how much he liked Hermione.

Then, Ronald Weasley did something very, very stupid.

"Hermione, did you do this for me?" He said, with his gaze still on her skirt.

Hermione pulled out her wand, waved it, and put it back, stowing her DS in her bag.

"Bye Harry." Hermione walked out of the compartment.

Harry stared at Ron.

"Ennervate." He said, pointing his wand at Ron.

Ron opened his eyes. "She loves me!"

Harry coughed. "Maybe."

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Hermione peered into the compartment.

"Shoshanna McKenzy?"

"That's me."

Hermione stared in shock. The girl was dressed in the same style as her, with the same kind of make-up. Her hair was a straight, fire-engine red and fell to her shoulders.

"Ha! Looks like I found a friend. You the Head Girl?"

Hermione smiled. "Yes." She sat down next to Shoshanna.

"Hermione Granger." She said, holding out her hand.

Shoshanna smiled. "I'd tell you my name, but you already know it." Shoshanna shook Hermione's hand.

"Hmm… You haven't always had an attitude like this, have you?" Shoshanna said, looking at her.

"Yeah… I used to be this really bookish girl. I always let my friends walk right over me. So I changed my attitude." Hermione shook her head.

"Yeah… I used to be this blonde cheerleader girl. Hah. I had horrible grades, too. But the thing is, I'm actually not that bad at magic." Shoshanna sighed. "So I'm going to try to do better here, plus I had some bad experiences and decided to change my attitude."

Hermione nodded, and they started exchanging life stories.

Shoshanna's mom was a muggle, and her dad a wizard. Her dad had told her mom the first time they said 'I love you', and they really loved each other. She had gone to the Lyndra magic school in the US, and moved here for her final year because her mom was from England.

By the time they finished talking, there was only half an hour until they arrived.

"I'll meet you at dinner?" Hermione said, one hand on the door.

"Sure." Hermione gave her a quick smile and ran back to the compartment.

This year was going to be good.


	2. Severus Snape's Worst Day Ever

**Changes**

**A/N: Well, here's the new chapter. Sorry for the wait… And many thanks to Marlicat, who is a great writer with excellent ideas, who gave me the inspiration to write.**

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Hermione sat down at her table, next to Shoshanna.

"Hey." Shoshanna whispered to her. "I didn't see you when you got off the train."

"McGonagoll. She wanted to talk about some Head stuff." Hermione whispered back.

At that moment, the sorting finished and Dumbledore began his speech.

"Hello students, new and old, welcome back, or as the case may be, simply welcome! This year we have an exchange student from the States, Shoshanna McKenzy!"

There was a scattered applause as Shoshanna stood up.

Normally, she wears short skirts, but her mom lengthened it since it was her first day at a new school. So it was normal length.

She sat down again and Dumbledore resumed his speech.

"This year's Head Boy is Terry Boot" –Terry Boot stood up- "and the Head Girl is Hermione Granger." Hermione stood up, with her hands behind her back. Her parents had not been at home so her skirt was short. Paired with the black, straight hair and the make-up, she didn't look anything like Hermione Granger.

"Miss Granger?" Dumbledore asked, slightly confused.

"Yup. That's me, professor." Hermione responded lightly.

"Well… Lets move on. Now, dinner!"

At dinner, there was a lot of talk about Hermione's new appearance.

"She's a _bookworm_. She isn't supposed to wear make-up and super-short skirts! She's prettier than us!" Lavender Brown wailed. "What are we going to do?"

"Shush. We have to ask her what's up. That can't be Hermione." Parvati turned to Hermione, who was sitting just a few seats away. "Hermione… You're so different! What happened?"

"Well… I just wanted a change. This is my last year. And it's going to be good." She turned back to Shoshanna.

"So, anyway, Shanna, there is no way you turned the teachers' hair blue."

"Well, it happened. I was bored, and I found that potion… It was so easy! I just snuck down to the kitchens. It was great."

Hermione shook her head. "You're so bad. But I have a strange new urge to prank with you…"

Shoshanna burst into laughter. "Yes! I had hoped that I would have someone to prank with! I thought this year was going to be a drag. But this is great!"

"So… What first?"

Hermione began telling her everything about everyone and who would be best.

After dinner, they already had an excellent plan. Life was good.

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

The next day was Monday. First day of term. The first class was potions.

Shoshanna and Hermione walked into the classroom five minutes' late.

"You are five minutes' late. Ten points from Gryffindor. This is a bad start for you, Miss McKenzy."

"Hey! Students can't take points from other students!" Shoshanna protested.

"I, am a teacher! Five more points from Gryffindor!"

"You? But you're so greasy!"

"Five more points from Gryffindor!"

Hermione took out her wand. "I could clean your hair for you."

"What?!" Snape was really, really angry.

She flicked her wand and his hair turned pink.

"Huh." Shoshanna grinned.

"Um… Sorry for the interruption, sir." Hermione said and pulled Shoshanna to a seat in the back.

He glared at them suspiciously, obviously not noticing his hair. And it's not like anyone wanted to tell him. The Slytherins might not like Hermione, but they still loved seeing Snape's hair pink.

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That lunch, Hermione and Shoshanna were chatting about their most recent prank when the doors flew open and Snape flew through them.

"Granger!" He yelled, his purple face clashing with his still pink hair.

"What?" Hermione said innocently, standing up with Shoshanna.

"My hair is pink! And I can't reverse it!"

"Oops! I tried to wash it… Maybe I should check my books again…"

"Turn it back!"

Hermione frowned for a minute, then brightened up. "Your hair will go back to normal after it's clean. Good luck!"

Snape glared. "What do you have to say for yourself?!"

Hermione pretended to think about it. She turned to Shoshanna. "What do I have to say?"

"How about 'duck'?" She offered.

"OK. That works. Duck!" they both flew to the ground.

"Duck? Why do I have to du-" He was cut off abruptly when all the pudding (excluding the pudding at the staff table) suddenly exploded.

Snape's face was covered in strawberry pudding.

"Hey! Your face matches your hair!" Hermione said happily, standing up.

"Granger!" He yelled. "You are in so much trouble! Detention!"

"What?!" Shoshanna said, outraged, as she stood up.

"That's right- detention!" He said, somewhat evilly.

"Yes I heard… But, only detention? For a prank that good? That deserves a bigger punishment then that!" Shoshanna said, shaking her head, and Hermione started grinning.

"Hey! I just realized! Now you have to wash your hair! And it'll stay pink until it's good and clean. You better buy some stronger shampoo!"

Snape glared at them. "Fifty points from Gryffindor!" He said, grinning even more evilly if possible. His evil grin faltered when he noticed that they were smiling.

"That's more like it! Right Shanna?"

"Right My."

Then Snape lunged at them, really, really mad. They jumped onto the table and off again on the other side with a lot of grace. Unfortunately, Snape didn't. He jumped onto the table too, but he slipped on some chocolate pudding and fell face-first into a bowl of ketchup.

The Great Hall burst into laughter, and there was some laughter at the staff table too, although they hid it better.

Hermione and Shoshanna just grinned and bowed.

Snape looked up at them, his face covered in ketchup and hate glinting in his eyes. "I will get you yet Granger, McKenzy! I will get you yet!" Then he stalked out of the Great Hall. Or, tried to. He slipped on some more pudding, and went flying and then slid out of the Great Hall, pudding trailing behind him.

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**A/N: That's it for now, folks. Like? Anyway, I'm going for maybe three-four chapters. As you all know, I'm not good at updating. I'll try to update sooner this time and thanks again Marlicat!**

** Alla**


	3. Sucks To Be You!

**Changes**

**A/N: Welcome back peoples! Remember, Marlicat just updated her awesome story. Go read it!!! **

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Hermione sat and stared glumly at the wall of the common room. Malfoy was being a git as usual, and she didn't know what to do about him. Shanna was on a date, and she was really bored. Everyone was down having dinner so she had no-one to talk to.

Then it hit her.

Malfoy was so dead.

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Hermione entered the Great Hall with a small skip in her step. She spotted Malfoy sitting at the Slytherin table and stalked up to him.

"What do you want, mudblood?" He said loudly.

Hermione looked at him blankly. "Did you just insult me?" She said, equally as loud, catching everyone's attention.

"Yes. Do you have a problem with that?" Malfoy said scathingly.

"Yes, actually. I do. Ee, I'm muggle-born. Which means I know stuff about computers."

"What?"

"Shut up. Anyway, this means that if you bug me, I will go on the Internet, hack into the US defense system and send a nuclear bomb to blow up your house." She said all this with a pleasant demeanor and a slight smile. "So… Don't bother me."

"Um…" Malfoy looked very uncomfortable. "OK… Sure. Sorry Granger. Um… You're not going to do that are you?"

"Not if you're nice to me. And kind. And don't bug me. Or bother me. Or annoy me. Understand?"

"Yes." He said, stiffly.

"Good. Ta!" With that she flounced off towards the Gryffindor table, to loud cheering. When she got to her table, she stood on top of the bench and bowed.

"Thank you everyone! You're too kind! Thank you, thank you."

"What's going on?" Snape said, entering. He was livid, obviously remembering the day before.

"I threatened to hack into the US defense network and bomb Malfoy's house." Hermione said, still on the bench.

Snape turned purple. "Granger! You have been causing trouble since the start of term, you and that new friend of yours. Might I remind you that I am a teacher?"

"No. But I can remind you that your hair is still pink."

Snape turned even purpler. Indeed, his hair was still pink. And dirty.

"Granger!"

Hermione smiled. "Ooh… You're mad. Your face is clashing with your hair."

"On another note, your skirt is too short!"

"Oh. My. God. Have you been looking at my skirt?" Hermione stood up on the table. "Pervert!" She called. "This guy has been looking at my short skirt! He should be arrested!" She pointed her finger at him, and his face went paler than usual. She drew her robe around her so that you couldn't see her clothes underneath.

All the faces in the Great Hall were now looking at them.

There weren't any teachers there yet, thankfully.

Hermione glared at Snape.

"Fifty points from Gryffindor!"

Hermione suddenly shouted. "Yes! Yes! I win! Thank you so much Snape!" She bent down, kissed Snape in victory and then ran out of the Great Hall yelling in triumph.

"Um…" The Great Hall was suddenly very silent, and was trying to not touch his lips where she had kissed him. (**A/N: Gross! Gross! And gross!**) Then he looked around and followed her example and ran out of the Great Hall.

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo

Hermione ran yelling throughout the castle until she was stopped by a passing student.

"What are you doing?" The student yelled back at her.

"I got to one hundred first! First! Ha! I won! Shanna has to make-out with Snape!"

"What?"

Hermione slowed down. "Shoshanna and I made a bet to see who could lose a hundred points first and I won! She has to make-out with Snape! Not just a kiss, make-out!"

"She lost a hundred points?!" Said the horrified Gryffindor.

"No! I did! I won!"

"What the hell?" The horrified Gryffindor looked at her Head Girl badge. "You're the Head Girl! How could you do that?"

Hermione shrugged. "It doesn't really matter anyway. I don't mind the detentions and the house points wont matter after I leave school."

The Gryffindor was still horrified. "What did you do to lose a hundred points?"

"Well, there was the small things then Snape took fifty points from me when I called him a pervert, teased him about his pink hair and I threatened to hack into the US defense network and bomb Malfoy's house. Oh, and before I called him a pervert I accuse him of looking at my skirt because he said it was too short."

"Nice. But it also sounds like you deserved to get in trouble…" The Gryffindor sighed and continued walking and Hermione continued running around the castle screaming.

"I won! I won! In your face Shanna! I can't believe I won! I did it! I! Did! It! Yes! Go me! I won! Oh! My! God! Oh my go-" Abruptly she fell down the stairs, rolling down it until she collapsed on the bottom and on top of two random students and Shoshanna.

"Ouch." Hermione said.

"My? What happened?" Shoshanna looked the two students. First years, but they didn't get hurt. Just a little winded. "Shoo! Go! Out!" The first years ran away in shock and terror.

"I won!" Hermione said happily. "Snape docked me fifty points. So I won! And I was screaming and running around the castle but I wasn't paying attention and fell down the stairs. It hurt."

"It hurt for me more. Urgh! Now I have to make-out with Snape! I shouldn't have gone on my date." Shoshanna sighed.

"It's OK. I think _I_ might have kissed Snape…" Hermione said, suddenly recalling what had happened. "Oh… My… God… I did! I did! I kissed him! On the lips!" She suddenly shuddered then started screaming. "I kissed Snape! I kissed Snape! Gaaaaaaah!" She kept on screaming long after she should've run out of breath.

"My? My?! Hermione!" Shoshanna waved a hand in front of Hermione's face, but she kept on screaming.

Shoshanna put her hand over Hermione's mouth. "Shush. Calm down. It's going to be ok. We'll go give you a shower and you'll be all clean and get the gross Snape-y-ness off of you."

"OK…" Hermione said, numbly. "OK…"

Shoshanna led Hermione up a flight of stairs, heading for Gryffindor tower.

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**A/N: OK, that's the end of this chapter. I think that next one is going to be the last one. This isn't about the whole year, just about some stuff. Anyway, jellybeans for everyone! Now, I'm going to have more time to update, since I had my exam today, I've got another one tomorrow and the last on Friday. I live in China for now, and in the Chinese schools you don't get Christmas off but I get three weeks off in winter, and we have exams right before vacation. My Chinese exam was today, and it was only two hours so we left school at ten. Tomorrow is maths and we'll have the same time, and again on Friday for English. (They learn English starting in first grade! Huh!) so I have the rest of the day free. Of course, for vacation this year 'm going home to MA to see my grandparents and old friends so I might not be able to update as I'm not sure I'll have computer access. After my birthday in March, I might get a really small laptop so I'll be able to update anywhere, and I'll be able to update on the sixteen hour plane ride since most US airports have Wi-Fi. So… That's it for this author's note. God it's long. Anyway… Ta! **

**Alla**


	4. Ultimate Grossness

**Changes**

**A/N: Well, here's the next chapter. And so soon! It's not going to end this chapter… Maybe the next but this one's going to be kind of short. Sorry. Anyway, enjoy!**

T

Severus Snape entered the Great Hall scowling. His nice, clean hair shining. He tried to sneak up to his seat without anyone noticing, but that idiot, Hermione Granger, spotted him and stood up in triumph.

"Attention folks! If you would look to the doors, you will see that Shoshanna McKenzy's plan worked. Snape now has clean hair!" Everyone at once turned to see him standing there. He gave everyone an eviler scowl than usual and he continued to the staff table.

T

Hermione sighed and walked down the corridors grinning. Snape had clean hair! It was clean! Not greasy! And it looked good… _Wait… Did I just think that? Sigh. Well… I kinda wish that I had lost the contest… Only a little… Eew! Not at all! I'd have to make-out with Snape! Gross!_ Hermione shook her head and continued.

She heard the sound of kissing coming from an empty classroom. _Yay! Now I can bust someone! I hope it's Malfoy!_ She smiled at that thought and entered the classroom.

What she saw made the smile fall off her face. "Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh!!!!!!!!!!!!"

She stared at the sight in front of her.

Severus Snape was making out with Minerva McGonagoll.

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh!!!!!!" She screamed again since the first one didn't express just how horrified she was.

"Five points from Gryffindor, Granger!"

"Aaw… Sevie-poo, don't take points from her, she was probably just doing her job."

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh!!!!!!!!" She screamed again at this comment. Then again.

"Fine. Five points to Gryffindor, Granger."

"Wonderful." McGonagoll turned back to Snape and kissed him again.

"Oh, by the way, Granger. Five points to Gryffindor for making me wash my hair."

"Aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagh!!!!!" Hermione turned and ran screaming out of the room.

"McGonagoll and Snape! Snape and McGonagoll!!!! Gaah! Gaaaaah! AAAAAAAAAGH!!!!!" Hermione froze and kept on screaming. She was in the entrance hall right off the Great Hall, and students were starting to come out and see why she was screaming.

Shoshanna went over to Hermione and patted her back. "My, what's wrong? Are you ok?"

Hermione shook her head numbly. "Sn… Mc… Um… Gr… Wh…"

"Hermione?"

"Wh…"

"Hermione?!"

"Sn…"

"Hermione!! What happened?"

"Snape and McGonagoll! They were kissing in an empty classroom, and… McGonagoll called him 'Sevie-poo'!" Hermione burst into tears. "It was so horrible!"

"Calm down Hermione… Wait… What did you just say?! Snape and McGonagoll?"

"She said she liked his hair! How clean it was!"

"Oh god…"

Hermione started wailing. "It was so horrible!"

Shoshanna patted Hermione on the back and started leading her back to the tower.

"Oh… My… God…" Said Lavender. "We have to tell everybody. High five!" She high-fived Parvati.

"The whole school!"

T

**A/N: Wow… That is so gross. Sorry if I overdid it a little, but that's probably how I would react… I mean, grossness!!! Yup, that is definitely how I would react. shudders Blergh. I mean, blegh. Gak, gak, gak, gak. Gurkle. Meeple. Blrgh… **

**Ta!**

Alla


	5. The End

**Changes**

**A/N: Just to clear things up, the last chapter was Hermione's dream. Just a dream. The first part, with the clean hair thing and him going to the staff table was real, but the rest was a dream. Enjoy!**

_**Changes**_

Hermione woke up with a start. She remembered laughing at Snape's hair, but the rest was a dream. Thank god. That was gross.

With a shudder, she went down to breakfast.

_**Changes**_

Hermione sat down heavily and Shoshanna looked up.

"Snape's hair is greasy again. The cleanliness only lasted, like, five minutes. What are we going to do?"

Hermione sighed. "I really have no clue. We need something ne-" She was cut off when Ron went running by screaming, "I'm being stalked by a house-elf!"

Hermione watched the back of Ron getting smaller and smaller. "That was weird."

"Yeah."

_**Changes**_

It was Saturday, so after breakfast they went back to their dorm.

Shoshanna ran into the bathroom saying, "I have to get ready for my date!"

"What, another one?"

"Yeah, but this one is with Draco Malfoy."

"What?!"

"Yup."

"OK… Don't forget you have to kiss Snape on Monday."

"Fine. But I'm still going on my date."

"Whatever." Hermione picked up a book that was on her bedside table.

"Did I check out 'The Color of Magic' from the Library?"

"Yes."

"Then I think it might be three months overdue. I checked it out before you came, how did you know?"

"I read it, saw the Library stamp."

"Ah. Ok. Bye!" Hermione pocketed the book and ran out of the room.

_**Changes**_

Snape prowled the corridors, looking for Granger. He was going to get her blood.

All of a sudden, a blur came rushing past him, knocking him into an empty classroom where Peeves was staying, and Peeves decided to pour ink all over him. Snape heard a 'sorry' in Granger's voice from the blur. Once again, Granger had made a fool of him.

He was definitely going to get her blood. Then he would bath in it!

Okay, maybe not 'bath', per say. That might be a little illegal.

_**Changes**_

Ron ran through the castle, screaming about the house-elf that was stalking him, when a blur raced by him pushing him down three flights of stairs where he was knocked unconscious. Not dead, since he was slowed down by all the students.

A house-elf creeped out of the shadows and started dragging his still form into a secret passage.

Maybe he was right about the stalking thing.

_**Changes**_

Harry caught Hermione walking out of the Library with the librarian yelling after her. "Hey, have you seen Ron?"

"No, sorry Harry. Why?"

"I haven't seen him since lunch."

"Harry… It's nine AM."

"What?!" Harry checked his watch and calmed down. "No, it's five in the afternoon."

Hermione looked at his watch. "Harry, your watch stopped. See? The little hand isn't moving." She walked over to the nearest stair and sat down on the banister. "Later dude!" She called over her shoulder and slid down it.

_**Changes**_

Snape watched her sit down on the banister at the top of the staircase.

He conjured a big tub of maple syrup right beneath the bottom. Perfect.

He watched her start to slide down and crouched next to the tub.

At the bottom she did a little jump and landed right _after_ the tub, but she managed to knock it over and spray Snape with syrup.

"Whoops." She said, with a little giggle and a flirty wave. "Ta!" She smiled and ran off.

Snape grumbled and cleaned up the syrup. "I'm going to get you!" He called after her but she only waved her hand and continued on her way.

Grumble.

_**Changes**_

Monday morning. Potions. The class was pretty boring, but after was fun.

Right before the end of class, Shoshanna stood up.

"Miss McKenzy, sit down."

"No. I have to do this, I lost a bet."

Hermione stood up and bowed, then sat down again.

"What?" Snape looked at her, a little worried. Hermione and Shoshanna's reputation had quickly grown. Now, they were seen as the new James Potter and Sirius Black. Worse then Fred and George.

Shoshanna sighed and walked over to him standing right in front of him. Now he was really worried. She turned around at looked at Hermione.

"Do I have to do this?"

"Yes. Do it."

Shoshanna sighed and turned back to Snape.

"You do not know how badly I don't want to do this." She reached up, grabbed his tie and pulled him into a really, really long kiss.

After what seemed like a year, she pushed him away, wiped her mouth, grabbed her bag and left just as the bell rang.

Snape stared at the door she had just left through and tried really hard not to grin. Shoshanna really was pretty with her bright red hair and matching nails.

"Um… Class dismissed?" Snape turned away so no one would see his face, then he realized something. He turned back and yelled, "Granger! What did you do?"

"We made a bet. She lost, she had to make-out with you. I feel really sorry for her. You're a bad kisser." She burst into laughter at this at left the classroom shaking her head.

Snape glared back at her, remembering what had happened in the Great Hall the other day.

"I will get you yet, Granger!"

"Good luck with that!" Hermione called behind her. This was going to be an interesting year.

_**Changes**_

Meanwhile, down in a dark dungeon somewhere, Ron was still locked in a dungeon, being used by the house-elves as a sex slave.

No one really knows why.

Eventually, he was found, and he's fine. Somewhat. The house-elves weren't fired, and in fact were rewarded by Draco Malfoy. He doesn't really like Ron.

When Ron grew up he found easy work as a stripper for house-elves, and to this day has made a really good living off the money they stole from whoever they belonged to.

Ron never got married. And in fact, when the woman heard about his job, they wouldn't even go out with him. Isn't life weird?

_**The End**_

**A/N: That's the end, folks. But never fear, I'm going to be starting another story soon. Here's some dedications: for all you people who reviewed! Thanks! And thanks again! To Marlicat. Without her, I never would have been able to finish. Thank you so much!**

**Until next time,**

**Alla**


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